Dreams.

Every child has a dream.

Some dream of becoming doctors. Some, lawyers.

Some dream of having the latest playstation. Some, the latest fashion.

I've lived many of my dreams.

Except perhaps, being a construction worker with the yellow boots and hammer. One day.
 
=)

I've reached a point in my life where you start to realise that these childish dreams don't have much room for the adult world. They're best kept safe in a treasure chest of memories, dug up some day to reminisce.

When you're at this stage, you realise there are social expectations that need to be met.

And then it's easy to forget how to dream. It's easy to get stuck and just go through the motions of the day.

Its easy.

 

I don't think I have an answer to this one. Yet.

 

All I know is that, it's moments like these that the God I know walks with me, closer than all the other moments of my life, and there have been many. Even if it doesn't feel like it. I know He's ingeniously working behind the scenes, for me.

 

 







Rumours.

A rumour is defined as 'information, often a mixture of truth and untruth, passed around verbally' (the freedictionary. com)

Rumours, always have serious consequences because:-

Lots of people will have differing opinions. Some of them can be very strong ones which can and will, influence a lot of other people's opinions. The consequence? People's perception of who you really are will change.

As a girl, what are the best ways to avoid such situations?

Always surround yourself with a group of other girls. It's alright to hang out with other guys, as long as it is on a friend level.

Never entrust yourself to a person of another sex unless you are in a serious committed relationship. This not only has implications for yourself, but also for the guy.

What if you find yourself in such a situation?

If you find it difficult with friends, then talk to a trusted person ie your mum or dad, a best friend etc. But it is important to talk, as it can be really unhealthy to keep it in.

A rumour is a rumour, and they're called that for a reason. Sometimes, its impossible to even know if such a thing is happening. So, what do you do if you think you're in such a situation?

You are your own best friend. Trust the way you feel about the situation. When you're certain about something, follow step two. There is counsel and wisdom in the advice of another. With that being said, make sure it's someone you really trust.

There will be a time and place to deal with the rumour, appropriately.

Remember,

There is wisdom in speaking only what is necessary, in honesty.

Drugs. Sex. Alcohol.

Okay. If you're a girl like me when you're on your own you enjoy your own company, likes to read, likes music, day dreamer (and you can add to the list) the three words in the title may be a taboo, or even may be a little awkward for you to talk or think about.

The thing is, no one really tells you or explains to you this whole side of life. I think there is a time in everyone's life where you do get exposed to these things. The question is, what do you do about it?

No offence intended to the people who do enjoy this side of life, I'm addressing people who are as described in the first paragraph.

1) Know yourself well. If you're uncomfortable with something, say no.

2) Social engagements, parties and the like. They're alright. But be smart, go with friends. Again, rule one applies. Sometimes, its harder with the pressures of friends in socials. Then again, if you're comfortable enough with yourself, you would know your limits and you would know how to say no. Don't worry; people get it. I was lucky that my close group of friends were like minded as myself and so really, social engagements were what they were really all about: socialising.

You don't have to be afraid to join in. Just be comfortable with yourself, be smart, and enjoy the company =)

3) And of course, if you don't want to go for something, a 'no' is fine too.

Boys.

Quite probably the strangest beings I've come across.

I mean, hey, I grew up with two of them (dont worry guys, I love you both to bits and pieces! You're both the coolest and only brothers I know =) Hugs.)

I think that makes me a girbo (girl + boy) very unoriginal, and not really that cool sounding; Tomboy = (boy + boy) because Tom = boys name. Who came up with tomboy anyways?

Sociology teaches that when kids are young, parents nurture them into their roles as boy or girl by giving them toys meant for their gender. Eg. A boy gets cars/ hammers/ and building blocks; A girl gets dolls/ doll houses/ cooking things 'masak - masak' as commonly termed back in Malaysia.

When I was a kid, all I wanted to do was take my brother's toy cars (sadly girls, I actually thought they were way cooler than dolls) but. I loved my dolls very much. So my dolls got to sit on my brother's toy cars (which also meant that my brother had no toys to play with, sorry bro).

They don't teach you that in sociology. The boy or girl kind that is fascinated with the other kind's toys.

So, I guess if you were like me (as in the above), you could be a 'girbo' too =). Or a 'bogirl' (boy + girl) = I don't know what the real equivalent of a tomboy for a guy's version is. Is there even one?

5/4/11

This, is where I never thought I would be. For as long as I can remember, I never wanted to do law. I remember having significant thoughts when I was younger that I would never be able to handle the pressures of becoming a lawyer. I detested the idea of pursuing a career in law.

My family and friends, people who knew me best knew this well- each time someone said you should take up law my answer was the same- no, i's not my thing. I'm terrified of public speaking, I shy away from crowds, debates? I thought of them but I never got involved, my face flushes and my ears burn when I get caught up with saying something but it comes out all wrong.

However, this was not the sole reason and definitely not the main one as to why I did not want to get involved with the study of law. After all, intellectual confidence is something you can work on.

I saw injustice and unfairness first hand countless number of times. I did not like how some authorities abused its powers for personal gains and satisfactions. One experience as an 8 year old child in school was that I saw my classmate being held up by his collar by one of our subject teachers and pushed against the wall. Why? Because the teacher did not like him, his colour to be exact. My friends were terrified, but I wanted to go up to the teacher and make him stop (I am being polite here). I felt sick to the pits of my stomach. Needless to say, bringing it up with the appropriate authorities only got me into trouble.

How come then, did I not want to get involved with pursuing a career that could help me seek out justice and righteousness? Back then, my thoughts on those involved in the legal profession were of proud, emotionless people. It was naive of me to generalise this thought to all in the profession, but that was how I felt.

I wanted to feel for society, to care for society. I was brought up to believe that if you were going to do something- do it with passion! I did not want to do law because I felt the law mentality would turn me into someone different. (This is true...to a certain extent). However, only later on (including the present time) did I realise that if I wanted to make a stand for justice and pursue righteousness, it was the study of law that I should be embracing and not avoiding...

Friendship.

...the essence to stable relationships.

I believe that friendship is the essence to stability in all relationships. Like, relationships stemming from a personal faith in God, a parent- child relationship, brothers and sisters, friends *you name it*. 

But what about that 'special relationship'?

I'd like to think that everyone wants to take it from this,

to this,

 

Right?

 



Contrary to popular belief, (and this is just my own personal opinion), I think the essence of a special relationship is friendship, and the root cause of stability in that relationship, is friendship. I think, that's how you get from image one to image two.

What do you think?

 

=)



Bitterness.

"Often the injustice of the situation in which people find themselves in create deep hurts, wounds in the spirit, and anger that is so near the surface that the individuals involved risk sinking into the trap of bitterness. Thoughts may turn inwards as they consider the unfairness of the situation and dwell on how badly they have been treated."

It is a painful place to be in. Bitterness is something that creeps up on you without realisation. It stems from unmet expectations, misunderstandings, and unresolved issues. I'm trying to think of an analogy here but none comes to mind, so *insert own analogy*.

I guess the key thing is to recognise it when it does creep up. It is an energy drainer that leaves you feeling really hollow. Not to say that you forget the situation of which it arose from, but rather to recognise the root cause of the emotion. Once you find the cause of it, it is much easier to look forward with hope.

Shoes

Of all the things. I forgot my sport shoes for the gym today.

Running barefoot on the field was nice though =) Haven't done that in ages.

Primary school. Sports day. Dakshayani encourages me and tells me its all going to be fine. Just imagine being chased by *a name of an animal I shall not mention here*. I dont know which one was scarier, the black clapping thingy the guy used for the countdown or the thought of my friend's encouragement. All I know is I never ran so fast in my life. After a few years of running events, I figured it was pure adrenalin.

I got gold. I did not expect it. But it was great. Turning around right after the finish line, and catching a glimpse of my paps jump out of his chair- was funny. That was probably one of the most memorable moments as a kid.

So yeah. It was great to feel the grass under my feet as I did some running today. Totally flash- backed.

Thank You.

The Balancing Act.

Oh my gosh. Madness! (Well, the thought of it is).

Thanks to a dear friend, for slapping sense into me =)

xox

Love

A passionate expression of life. 

It's in the things we see, the people we meet, the experiences we make.

It's in a sunset or a sky full of stars. It's in a friend, who's always been there. It's in those memories of a lifetime.

Love. It makes the world go round.

~Love is patient, love is kind. Love never fails.

Honesty.

It never runs dry =)

 

 

Laskar Pelangi

 

Mimpi adalah kunci
Untuk kita menaklukkan dunia
Berlarilah tanpa lelah
Sampai engkau meraihnya

Laskar pelangi
Takkan terikat waktu
Bebaskan mimpimu di angkasa
Warnai bintang di jiwa

Menarilah dan terus tertawa
Walau dunia tak seindah surga

Bersyukurlah pada yang kuasa
Cinta kita di dunia

Selamanya...

Cinta kepada hidup

Memberikan senyuman abadi
Walau hidup kadang tak adil
Tapi cinta lengkapi kita

Laskar pelangi
Takkan terikat waktu
Jangan berhenti mewarnai
Jutaan mimpi di bumi

Menarilah dan terus tertawa
Walau dunia tak seindah surga
Bersyukurlah pada yang kuasa
Cinta kita di dunia

Menarilah dan terus tertawa
Walau dunia tak seindah surga
Bersukurlah pada yang kuasa
Cinta kita di dunia

Selamanya...

Selamanya...

Laskar pelangi
Takkan terikat waktu...

 

Indifference.

 

Pain's progress.

Fear.

 

Its the one thing that paralyses. It breaks. It prevents.

 

Its a natural inclination. In some ways, its good. It guards. It protects.

 

But, to what extent is fear a healthy thing?

 

To be guarded is to protect yourself, but to be overguarded is to break and prevent. That's the beginning of a paralysing fear.

 

You look around and staring back at you, another wave of doubt - will it pull you under, you wonder?

- Britt Nicole



Dancing in the Rain

Life isn't about learning how to weather the storm, its about learning how to dance in the rain.